Safety begins at HOME..

I was watching a beautiful movie, ‘THANKS MAA’, its when i realized children in our country are going through so much behind closed doors. In India, people have a very apathetic approach towards the sensitive issue of Child abuse. But time and again, incidents remind us of educating children and also making laws more stringent. Though, recommendations of Justice Verma Commission Report which was appointed to address the issue after Nirbhaya episode were followed and several changes were made in rape laws. Still, such cases are increasing with the passing day. Every day or another cases related to child abuse make headlines. 

According to the NGO, Child Rights and CRY, on an average 14 children go missing every day in New Delhi itself. According to a reply to an RTI plea filed by a CRY and Alliance for People’s rights (APR), 4,086 children went missing in 2012 while 2,161 and 5,004 children in 2010 and 2011 respectively. A majority of India’s 440 million children are subjected to some form of sexual abuse, say reports. According to a study conducted by the Ministry of Women and Child Development in 2007, two out of three children face physical abuse, and 42 per cent of children face sexual abuse in some form. According to Asian Centre for Human Rights, number of reported child rapes had gone up from 2,113 in 2001 to 7,112 in 2011. In 2007, a report on the state of child protection issued in India prompted then Government to take stringent action in this direction. The National Commission for Protection of Child Rights was set up to develop strict laws and policies on the issue.

To protect the innocence we must educate them to be cautious and alert. Here is a list of things you need to teach your Children at early age: 

1: Warn your Girl Child Never to sit on anyone’s laps no matter the situation including uncles.

2: Avoid Getting Dressed in front of your child once he/she is 2 years old. Learn to excuse them or yourself.

3. Never allow any adult refer to your child as ‘my wife’ or ‘my husband’.

4. Whenever your child goes out to play with friends make sure you look for a way to find out what kind of play they do, because young people now sexually abuse themselves.

5. Never force your child to visit any adult he or she is not comfortable with and also be observant if your child becomes too fond of a particular adult.

 5. Once a very lively child suddenly becomes withdrawn you may need to patiently ask lots of questions from your child.

6. Carefully educate your grown ups about the right values of sex . If you don’t, the society will teach them the wrong values.

7: It is always advisable you go through any new Material like cartoons you just bought for them before they start seeing it themselves.

8. Ensure you activate parental controls on your cable networks and advice your friends especially those your child(ren) visit(s) often.

9. Teach your 3 year olds how to wash their private parts properly and warn them never to allow anyone touch those areas and that includes you (remember, charity begins from home and with you).

 10: Blacklist some materials/associates you think could threaten the sanity of your child (this includes music, movies and even friends and families).

    

    11. Let your child(ren) understand the value of standing out of the crowd.

12 Once your child complains about a particular person, don’t keep quiet about it.

Take up the case and show them that you can defend them.

Remember, we are either parents or parents-to-be..

Image Courtesy: Google images, The Hindu, Childline

RAPE ‘The only crime in which the victim becomes the accused..’

In 2002 there was an article in a magazine that read ‘In India girl is raped every 54 minutes’, now the times have changed and in this rapid growing country of ours the number of rapes increased and we as a country have a brilliant record now. Today the same line has changed to ‘In India a girl is raped every 20 minutes’ !

If one goes by the latest statistics of National Crime Records Bureau ( NCRB), every day 93 women are being raped in the country. NCRB statistics shows that 31,807 (94%) were familiar to the accused, which includes neighbors (10782), other known persons (18171), relatives (2315) and parents (539).

A Commonwealth Human Rights Initiative (CHRI) analysis of reported rape cases between 2001 and 2013 shows 2,64,130 rapes were reported in 28 states during the 13-year period – an average of almost 56 incidents of rape per day.

We always talk about Delhi but even in Maharashtra the number of reported incident increased by 135%, rising from 1,302 in 2001 to 3,063 in 2013. According to the  National Crimes Record Bureau (NCRB) 24,923 was the total number of reported rape cases in India in 2012. In 2013 the number was 33,707 And 2014 is still going and shows no sign for any decline in numbers with the very recent list of rape cases in news.

Now lets take a look at current Law situation. According to IPC 376 (rape) – Gives upto Life Time imprisonment. Although in Section 376 (E) of Indian Penal Code (IPC) This section deals with punishment for repeat offenders in rape cases. It provides for death by hanging as the maximum punishment or life imprisonment till death, to a person who has been previously convicted in a rape or gang-rape case or who has been convicted earlier in a rape case where he inflicted injuries that causes death of the woman or puts her in a persistent vegetative state.

• 1973: Aruna Shaunbag: A junior nurse at King Edward Memorial hospital in Mumbai, tied with a dog chain, assaulted and raped by a ward boy. She lost her eyesight and has been in a vegetative state since. SC turns down mercy killing.

• 1978: Geeta and Sanjay Chopra were kidnapped for ransom in Delhi in the infamous Ranga-Billa kidnapping case. The culprits raped Geeta before killing them both.

• 1982: Tulasa Thapa, a 12-year-old Nepali girl, was repeatedly raped before being sold into prostitution. Ten months later, she was brought to JJ Hospital in Mumbai where she died of brain tuberculosis and three sexually transmitted diseases.

• 1990: A 14-year-old school girl was raped at her residence in Calcutta and killed by a security guard. Dhananjoy Chatterjee was executed in August 2004, the country’s first hanging since 1995.

• 1996: A 16-year-old girl was sexually harassed and assaulted continuously for 40 days by 42 men in Kerala. In 2000, a special court sentenced 35 persons to rigorous imprisonment but the Kerala High Court acquitted them in 2005.

• 1996: 25-year-old law student Priyadarshini Mattoo was found raped and murdered at her house in Delhi. Ten years later, the Delhi High Court found Santosh Kumar Singh guilty.

• 1999: The estranged wife of an Indian Forest Service officer, Anjana Mishra’s car was stopped at a desolate place on the outskirts of Bhubaneswar. She was gang raped in front of the friend she was travelling with.

• 2002: A fourth-year medical student was gang raped at knife point on the terrace of the Khooni Darwaza monument situated on the busy Bahadurshah Zafar Marg in the capital.

• 2003: Shari S. Nair, a teenaged girl hailing from Kiliroor, Kottayam, Kerala, was sexually abused after being promised roles in TV serials. Shari later died after giving birth to a daughter.

• 2004: 32-year-old Thangjam Manorama was tortured and allegedly executed by personnel of the paramilitary force of 17 Assam Rifles stationed in Manipur, after being picked up from her house.

• 2005: 28-year-old Imrana was raped by her father-in-law in Uttar Pradesh. The village elders and Sharia courts nullified her marriage saying her husband was now her son.The police registered a case under section 376 (rape) and 506 (intimidation). He was sentenced to 10 years and a fine of Rs 8000 for raping her and for criminal intimidation he was sentenced to 3 years and a fine of Rs 3000.

• 2005: A Delhi University student was gang raped by four men inside a Santro for several hours and dumped in south Delhi, unconscious and without clothes.

• 2009: Two young women were raped and murdered in Jammu under mysterious circumstances, allegedly by CRPF personnel. One of them was two months pregnant at the time.

• 2010: A 30-year-old BPO employee was raped by five men near her home in south Delhi. The woman was pulled into a mini truck, raped repeatedly and thrown out two hours later.

• 2011: A nine-year-old mentally disabled girl was raped on a Mumbai train in front of five other passengers. The child could not scream or shout or speak because she was disabled.

• Feb 2012: A 37-year-old woman was gangraped in a car on Calcutta’s Park Street after coming out of a bar. Mamata Banerjee first said the case was cooked up to embarrass her government.

• Dec 2012: An eighteen-month-old baby, the daughter of pavement dwellers, was found by her mother one morning covered in blood. Doctors said she had been raped and tortured.

• Dec 2012: A two-year-old was raped, allegedly by her maternal uncle, and thrown into a thorny bush in Baroda, Gujarat. She died after being taken to the hospital.

• Dec 26, 2012: A 20-year-old woman was allegedly gangraped by 10 people on the banks of Manimuktha river near Virudhachalam in Tamil Nadu, according to police.

May 27, 2014:  An alleged gang rape and murder of two teenage girls was reported in the Katra village of, Badaun District, Uttar Pradesh, India.             Case PENDING!

The delay in justice and the present quantum of punishments are not a deterrent to stop Crimes against women and rapes.

These are some RAPE CASES that shook the country and still nothing much happened. But now not only ‘Damini’ but all of them need answers. Its time country remembers them all.

And the list goes on,Sexual assault is a horrific offense, and institutions must do all they can to protect victims. All should remember;                                                                                                                                                                       

                 ‘A woman brought you into this world, so you have no right to disrespect one.’

Sources: NCRB , CHRI , Google.

Education : the only way to save innocence !

Here is a list of things you need to teach your Child(ren) at early age:

1: Warn your Girl Child Never to sit on anyone's laps no matter the situation including uncles.

2: Avoid Getting Dressed in front of your child once he/she is 2 years old. Learn to excuse them or yourself.

3. Never allow any adult refer to your child as 'my wife' or 'my husband'.

4. Whenever your child goes out to play with friends make sure you look for a way to find out what kind of play they do, because young people now sexually abuse themselves.

5. Never force your child to visit any adult he or she is not comfortable with and also be observant if your child becomes too fond of a particular adult.

6. Once a very lively child suddenly becomes withdrawn you may need to patiently ask lots of questions from your child.

7. Carefully educate your grown ups about the right values of sex . If you don't, the society will teach them the wrong values.

8: It is always advisable you go through any new Material like cartoons you just bought for them before they start seeing it themselves.

9. Ensure you activate parental controls on your cable networks and advice your friends especially those your child(ren) visit(s) often.

10. Teach your 3 year olds how to wash their private parts properly and warn them never to allow anyone touch those areas and thatincludes you (remember, charity begins from home and with you).

11: Blacklist some materials/associates you think could threaten the sanity of your child (this includes music, movies and even friends and families).

12. Let your child(ren) understand the value of standing out of thecrowd.

13: Once your child complains about a particular person, don't keep quiet about it.

>Take up the case and show them you can defend them.

>Remember, we are either parents or parents-to-be.

INSOMNIAC

  A restless soul, some unanswered questions, a few tears, the sound of silence, the shadows of the dark, bad memories of the past, a bad dream, an unfulfilled desire, the last goodbye....... 

All of the above are the reasons why i have insomnia!  

I so want to relive that time when i first felt love, stayed up all night thinking about her, blushed every time i saw her picture with me, loved the feel when my heart skipped beats as she touched me, loved my cell phone and loved all the late night talks that concluded only with the dawn, related to all the love songs, did not feel weird when things got mushy. Want to relive the FIRST TIME again, want to feel the magic again...But i know...that won’t happen the same way ever again...Once the dreams that were beautiful now wake me up as they have become nightmares. I hate it when i am alone in the house...  I can’t sleep in the nights...memories haunt me.., the bad ones. The one's that made me cry, the one's that changed me as a person, the one's that turned me into a paralyzed man once, the same one's that haunt me even today and every time manage to tear me apart. 

 I dream of all that i lived...you know, sometimes you scream and shout and ask people to believe you, sometimes you swear by every relationship that makes a difference just to prove the authenticity of each word, sometimes you beg and plead, sometimes you cry and sometimes you just put everything at stake just to prove how true you are, sometimes you let go because you don't see the point of any justification. Believe me...They shall fade away because I think I am ready to let them go. I need to break free and look at the brighter side of things. I think all of us should learn to let go, take a deep breath, and shed that last tear in the name of that bad memory and wake up to a morning of goodness. There is just too much that time can’t heal but its faith that keeps me going. How do you say good bye to a person you can't live without? I didn't say goodbye, I didn't say anythingI just walked away...

Too long...but I think I've just poured out a large chunk of what was weighing in my mind for long..

Only one person in the world knows what this is about..hope someday she reads it....       

I remember...she loved the rains...

She loved the rains..

The touch of rain-drops on her bare skin.

My lips drinking them dry.

I remember

how she sighed then.

The only other time she sighed like that was when

I whispered some Neruda to her.

She loved the rains......

I remember

when she sat next to me

On that rickshaw ride that rainy day,

and I covered us with an umbrella.

Her body shivered, with my touch.

I leaned down and licked those drops sliding down her neck.

I remember

how she sighed then.

The only other Time when she sighed like that was when

I whispered in her ear,”I love you princess...”

Her sparkling eyes with those missing eyelashes,

Looked at me and then looked down.

Her moist lips slowly mumbled but she bit them close.

I slowly placed my finger at that dimple on her cheek

I remember

how she blushed then..

I remember how we kissed in that rain...

I remember.... she loved the rains.....